On one of the first warm days of spring last year, I was walking through the cemetery with my friend Tiffany. She was pointing out all of the people who had died in their thirties and forties. I suppose that wasn’t entirely uncommon at the turn of the century (last century, that is). She then mentioned that she thinks of her age (30+) as her second life because so many of these people only had one life and it ended early.
She is exactly right. Historically it’s been rare for someone to live to be 100 years old. Just before 1900, the life expectancy was just under forty for both men and women. Okay, so I’m living MY second life. I’m living a life that many of those good people in the cemetery may have wished they had the opportunity to live.
I was literally awake an entire night pondering this. Not just for me, but for all of us. Those who are my age-ish are all working on their second lives. So what does that mean? Here are some of my thoughts…
- You may be an entirely different person in your second life than you were in your first life.
- You’re first life relationships may be incompatible with your second life.
- Your second life may bring a career change.
- Your second life may bring a change in your marriage status.
- Your second life may be defined by new goals.
- You may want to start a new family.
- You may want to take on new educational endeavors.
- You may want to sell all of your earthly possessions and sail the world.
- Second life is an opportunity to be more altruistic, generous, and awesome.
- Your second life is a gift.
I’ve learned a few parenting lessons along the way. My daughter is disabled by autism. I will continue to care for her through my second life but maybe I can offer some support to the first-life mothers who are struggling with autism.
Second-life me is going to be an awesome grandparent. With expectations of good health, I hope to help my children with their children. And I should! “Parent” is one title that transfers over to second life.
I hope this resonates with some of you. If it does, please comment and let me know your thoughts.
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