I was excitedly optimistic when I quickly found single mother of five/vocalist Raven. But the rest of the lineup hasn't been as easy. Yesterday after acquiring what seems to be the only female bass player in two counties, things were finally looking up... until this morning, when she called to say she'd had a change of heart.
Deflated, I mull over some of the responses we've gotten so far, including one that had Raven texting me this morning about driving to Miami. I'd barely had time to think about how unlikely the possibility of an impromptu roadtrip to the other coast on a “school day” would be before she texted, “Nevermind. It was for an adult video.”
My train of thought leads me to an absentminded Googling of HERA, which subsequently takes me to our Myspace page. It's impressive, considering we're not even a real band yet. The sexy photos. Creative logo. Clever catchphrase that reads, Cougars that know how to rock hard...Wait...what?
I cringe, stray cursor scrambling for the delete icon. How many of my friends and professional contacts have seen the cougar comment, I wonder. At least that explains the adult video offer. I shake off my humiliation and focus on something more productive: A Bandmix profile for a 29-year-old mother of 3 named Tara who plays keys. I send her a message, to which she responds that evening with a confession that she is only an amateur keyboard player and primarily a vocalist. Disappointed, I tell her I already have a vocalist, though I'm not just being polite when I tell her I will keep her contact information just in case. Maybe I'm just still reeling from the cougar debacle. Maybe not.
The next day, I follow up on a response from a female guitar player named Micky. I fall in immediate like with her after 5 minutes on the phone and schedule a meeting at a Starbucks in Sarasota. Though she is slightly older and less edgy than I'd hoped, she wins me, and surprisingly, even Raven, over with her great personality and Scottish accent.
On the way back to Venice, Raven and I discuss the possibility of Micky becoming part of HERA, as well as the fact that Micky knows a female bass player who may also be interested. It all seems too good to be true... .and it just may be since Micky's only means of transportation is motor scooter.
After a few days, Micky's lack of reliable transportation seems moot. Raven's already labeled her “flake” because Micky has not been in touch. I'm not sure why, but I have a sinking feeling that Micky is afraid of Raven.
Days later, ears undoubtedly burning, Micky finally calls me from a local music store. She says she's been talking me and my band up to guy who works there named Jeri Jay. The name is familiar: A guitarist for hire that plays around town. I saw him play years ago, but don't recall much beyond a long-haired middle-aged guy in a suit who played great guitar.
Micky puts Jeri on the phone, who greets me with a cheerful, “Hello.” Then without missing a beat, he asks, “When can I audition for your girl band?”
I feel a deep triangle forming in my brow, not sure which puzzles me more: The fact that Jeri wants to be in my girl band. Or the fact that he thinks he'd need to audition.
Unclear what part of girl band he doesn't get, I reiterate, “It's a girl band.”
“I know,” he replies in his manly New York voice. “Check out my MySpace page.”
The triangle in my brow deepens. “Okay. I will.” I'm mostly just being polite, but soon curiosity has me typing in the link. A hot pink page pops up on my computer screen. I lean in closer and peruse the profile picture of the middle-aged woman adorned in hot pink hair extensions, startling pink and blue makeup, a Hello Kitty tee, and pink leopard print skinny jeans. Did I type in the wrong link? Or am I thinking of a different Jeri?
I explore the Myspace page further, clicking on earlier pictures of a slightly less pink Jeri. A slightly less feminine one. I have the right link. The right Jeri, though apparently a lot's changed since the last time I saw him. Her....?
Bio: Jax Resto is a wife, mom and business owner by day, mom rocker by night. In 2010 she performed with Band of the Year at the Mamapalooza Festival in NYC. She left the band shortly after to start her own band of rockin' moms Female Band Invasion. But her mom rock band took an interesting turn. Visit www.reverbnation.com/femalebandinvasion.
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